Vladimir Putin’s state TV has offered to help the US grab Greenland and mocked Sir Keir Starmer for seeking to move troops to the world’s largest island.

The dictator’s regime has also blasted UK Defence Secretary John Healey’s desire to kidnap Putin and haul him before a war crimes court.

“The wet fantasies of British perverts,” declared senior foreign ministry official Maria Zakharova.

Healey’s train was caught in an air alert from the Russian strike on Lviv with a nuclear-capable Oreshnik missile.

Moscow thrashed out as the Kremlin banned its state media from discussing Monday being the 1,419th day of Putin’s war – exceeding the duration of the Soviet involvement in the Second World War between 1941-45.

The reason for the silence appears to be his lack of progress in almost four years of war, winning only tiny areas of Ukrainian territory despite losing more than one million men dead and wounded.

Instead, Putin’s leading TV mouthpiece Vladimir Solovyov offered to help Donald Trump seize Greenland

“We have entered extremely turbulent times. Trump is preparing for a major war,” said the state-funded prime time host who parrots Kremlin narratives.

“The [military] budget has been increased by 50%, bringing [it] to one and a half trillion.

“And for us, this is very beneficial if it means war with Europe

“We will be ready to help Trump free Greenland from this alien influence.

“Why not…?

“America has kept its occupation troops on European territory since 1945.

“It is no ally, you stupid European cattle

“It is your master, and now your master will tell you to ‘go to the stable,’ and you will run to the barn to grunt and watch and think, like [Sir Keir] Starmer, who cannot say what happened in Venezuela.”

The Putin crony ridiculed Britain’s lack of military readiness and minimal armed forces strength after the British premier signalled a readiness to join with France and Germany in sending troops to Greenland – part of the Kingdom of Denmark – in the hope of heading off a Trump takeover.

“You will not be able to say anything about Greenland, and you will not be able to deliver your troops to Greenland,” he told Starmer.

“First, you don’t have any troops.

Second, you have nothing to transport them with.

“The Americans will sink you on the way if they want to, and we will help.

“Well, just for the love of art.”

Trump has said he needs US ownership of Greenland to stop Russia or China invading.

Bloodthirsty Putin pundit Solovyov – who educated his children in Britain – also demanded Russia seeks to cripple Ukraine by killing three of its key leaders including Zelensky.

He also demanded death to Ukraine’s ambassador to London General Valeriy Zaluzhny, formerly the country’s senior war commander and the head of Zelensky’s administration Lt-Gen Kyrylo Budanov, until recently chief of the GUR military intelligence directorate.

“Enough pitying the enemy. They must be destroyed,” demanded Solovyov.

“We know who commands the units that give the orders to strike and carry them out.

“Why haven’t they been destroyed….?

“Why hasn’t Budanov been destroyed?

“Does changing his position mean he is no longer a terrorist?

“Why does Zelensky feel secure….?

“Why is Zaluzhny still alive?

“He is a war criminal, he is a terrorist.”

Zelensky claimed that Putin’s war – now longer than Stalin led the Soviet Union in WW2 – has seen the Russian dictator repeat Hitler’s fascism.

“They wanted to repeat and did repeat the mockery of people — repeated fascism, repeated almost all the worst things that happened in the 20th century,” he said.

Yet they had failed to gain significant territory in four years of fighting.

“The Russians are trying to capture the same Donbas as almost four years ago,” he said.

“They want to lie again that they have taken Kupyansk, are dying endlessly in the fields of Zaporizhzhia, and are still fighting against a united Ukraine….

“This says a lot about the system Putin has built.”

Zelensky pleaded for more Western aid to keep Putin at bay.

“Every day of war is a reminder that the world cannot protect itself from mad men,” he said.

Russia again attacked Kyiv and Odesa overnight.

In Chernihiv two medical workers were injured in a strike on an ambulance.

© 2026 Express UK