Trump wants to buy Greenland

Posted on by 17 comments

Fox News and others are reporting that Trump has asked his aides to explore the possibility of buying Greenland from Denmark. Probably it will come to nothing, but you never know…..

Which got me thinking about another mutually beneficial purchase: Ukraine. $2.1 trillion would be a good ballpark figure. Zel would become the governor of the biggest state in the union. Each citizen (not putlerite scum though) would receive $50,000. People under the age of 45 would get $30k, with the other $20k going into a trust. America would recover the costs from Ukraine’s vast mineral resources and a more efficient tax gathering system. I predict a referendum on such a proposal would be a massive yes vote. Ukraine would be safe: ‘Yuge’ military bases would be built there, protecting Ukraine and Europe from putlerstani aggression. Best of all, the poisonous rodent would be spitting blood. Then consolidate by purchasing Georgia and Moldova by the same method.

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